Have a Cultural-Appropriation-Free Coachella!

So I thought that after all the hub bub and social media around white people appropriating indigenous headdresses last year at Coachella that we would be passed this. But it looks like white people still don't fully understand what cultural appropriation is and the negative effects it has, as seen by this year's trend of white girls wearing bindis.

But is this really cultural appropriation? What even is and isn't cultural appropriation? Isn't America a melting pot of cultures? If we say wearing indigenous headdresses is cultural appropriation then can I not drink green tea anymore? Can I not get Thai takeout? Where do we draw the line? These are all questions I've asked myself because cultural appropriation is difficult to understand, especially as a person of the dominant cultural, or simply, not of the culture that is being appropriated, or even, someone of the culture being appropriated who doesn't know the significance of something in their culture or has been socialized to internalize racism.

So I'm going to explain cultural appropriation in terms of the power dynamics that are present between various cultures. I believe that an unbalanced power dynamic, a history of (and continuation of) oppression, and a lack of consent are the key factors of cultural appropriation. So let me break it down for you.

1. What is cultural appropriation? 

Kick ass little Rue from Hunger Games gives a great explanation of cultural appropriation of black culture, so check out that link. But essentially, cultural appropriation occurs when a style/part of a culture leads to racist stereotypes yet when the dominant/more privileged culture takes it, without consent, and usually for profit, it is deemed high culture/fashionable without them having any awareness of its significance to culture from which it came, especially when there is a history of oppression by the dominant culture of that original culture.

So the main components of cultural appropriation are:

• The thing leads to racist/negative stereotypes of the original culture.
• But the thing is high fashion when the dominant culture takes it.
• The thing is taken without consent.
• The thing is generally taken to make money off of. 
• The dominant culture isn't aware of the thing's significance, importance, reverence, etc. to the original culture.  
• The dominant culture has a history of oppressing, stealing from, and committing ethnocide against the original culture. 

So no, me drinking green tea is not cultural appropriation because green tea has never been used to oppress API communities. It has not been used to create negative and racist stereotypes against API communities. The origins of green tea in America goes back to trade between China and America, not forceful taking without consent. And although there are negative stereotypes against Asian cultures and the US has a history of oppressing the API community, none of this revolves around green tea. 

But yes, me wearing corn rows is cultural appropriation because this hairstyle is used to create negative stereotypes against black women and men. It is still deemed as a "unprofessional" hairstyle by some which leads to an economic oppression of the black community. Corn rows are also significant to the black culture in that it protects their natural hair. If I were to choose to wear cornrows, I would be taking part of black culture I considered quirky and fashionable while that community is still being oppressed and stereotyped for that same hairstyle. 

So think about the history of something and the relationship between two cultures before you decide to take it for your own. 

2. How can a culture be appropriated? 

Any part of a culture can be appropriated if it possess the characteristics I've just mentioned. That includes clothes/hairstyles, vernacular, food, music, rituals/celebrations, etc. Cultural appropriation doesn't just occur at Coachella by rich white girls. I see you, white boys, I see what you do.

Particularly problematic is white teen's (or anyone's, really) appropriation of AAVE (African American Vernacular English). AAVE has a huge significance in the black community in that it originated out of the African diaspora and has been historically considered a "less intelligent" or "less professional" dialect of English. The black community was and continues to be stereotyped for their vernacular and it is used as an excuse to further oppress this community.

For white teens to think it's trendy and comedic to appropriate words such as "slay", "yaaas", and "werk" which were created by the black community is a gross example of cultural appropriation and white privilege. These words gain traction via social media and become part of "teen" culture when they really originated from the black community who is still being negatively stereotyped for this vernacular.

3. Who can appropriate a culture? 

Listen here kids, only the dominant culture in a society can appropriate something from another culture, which must be a subculture with a history/current condition of being oppressed by that dominant culture.

For a marginalized group to "appropriate" something from the dominant culture would be considered assimilation. That dominant culture in America is that of patriarchy, capitalism, white supremacy, and Christianity. Those belonging to this culture have the most rights, experience the least (basically none) discrimination/oppression, and are idealized by the media and consumerism. So for a subculture to take parts of that culture would not be stealing anything from it without consent. And it surely wouldn't be based on a history of oppression. Assimilation is done to appear more part of the dominant culture for reasons of economic stability, physical safety, emotional health, etc.

So in the US, ONLY WHITE PEOPLE CAN APPROPRIATE CULTURE FROM MARGINALIZED GROUPS. Not vice versa. Never. It doesn't happen. It literally is not physically possible to happen.

4. What is the difference between cultural appropriation and cultural exchange/appreciation? 

First off, exchange is consensual. It is a mutual giving and receiving. For my green tea example, it would go something like this:

United States: "Hey if we give you some silver, can we have some of your tea?"
China: "For sure bros, thanks for the silver, here's your tea."

Second, appreciation is done with the awareness of significance and reverence for symbolism. Another example would go something like this:

White Person: "Damn, I just really admire and respect Buddhism. I truly believe in it's teachings and traditions. With utmost reverence I practice meditation, yoga, and taking refuge. So I think I'm going to get a tapestry of Buddha to remind me of Buddhism's core values and ethics that I practice in my daily life."

Like I said, appropriation is done WITHOUT consent so it does not involve an exchange of cultural things. It is also done without awareness of, or with complete disregard to, something's significance so it does not involve appreciation.

You are not appreciating or paying homage to Indigenous culture by wearing warpaint for one night to a music festival to seem artsy or "bohemian". You are completely ignoring and trivializing its cultural significance and spiritualism. You are participating in the stereotyping of a culture. You are contributing to the United State's history of committing ethnocide against Indigenous culture. You are also aiding the same capitalistic system that was used in justification for stealing from Indigenous cultures.

*So remember, contemplate before you appropriate*

Appropriation of Pain: White Guilt & LGBTQ Allies

So I have a hobby of hanging out in graveyards. I think they're beautiful and a poignant connection to the past. I also fully recognize the part of myself that finds it cathartic to borrow other people's pain for a little bit and then continue on my merry way. I think we can all relate to that concept to some degree. Ever slowed your driving to peep a roadside accident? Or been fascinated with a news story simply because it's a little graphic or morbid? Or at the age of 10 only read the obituary section of the newspaper? Just me? Okay then...

Point is, I think we can all imagine a time when we've found ourselves drawn to tragedy that has nothing to do with ourselves. Why is that? Because viewing someone else's pain from a distance, being removed from it, allows us to experience a catharsis of sadness and also allows us to feel grateful that the tragedy didn't happen to us. 

So per usual, I started to think about how this applies to social justice and marginalized groups. And wouldn't you know, it turns out the borrowing other people's lives and cultures, especially their pain associated with the oppression and criminalization of their lives and cultures, IS NOT A NICE THING.  

Appropriation is a really wide topic, so I wanted to just focus on appropriation of pain. So that means specifically trying to insert yourself into a marginalized group in an attempt to feel their pain or make yourself some sort of martyr for that group.

And who else is a more perfect candidate for this social justice no-no than straight allies? Let's talk about what is so morbidly wrong, and actually harmful to the LGBTQ community, about straight allies.

1. Straight people already have enough social space of their own. So straight allies, GTFO of ours!!!

LGBTQ spaces are created for many reasons, but some of those include providing physical and emotional safety for our community. Any spaces - physical, social, written, etc.- that revolve around the LGBTQ community are created because we need bonds, support, validation, and visibility. STRAIGHT PEOPLE DO NOT NEED THIS. You get validation for your sexuality every day since the day you're born, you have visibility in literally everything, and you don't really need support for a sexuality that is the social "norm".

The full acronym (that I'm aware of and is by no means official as identities are always being renamed, reclaimed, and realized) is LGBTTQQIAPP and I'd argue +D for demi. And what does that A stand for? Asexual. Is there another A for allies? Hell fucking no. By including yourself in the LGBTQ acronym or community, you are basically stating that you feel entitled to a safe space when you're already safe. Under the guise of social justice and empathy you are taking resources and space from those who truly need it. Be an ally but do social justice work in your own lane not ours.

2. Straight people literally directly experience 0% of the pain and struggle of coming out or self-identifying as queer. 

There have been too many damn times when I've experienced straight allies showing up to LGBTQ events and getting on a soap box dramatic monologue about their struggle of supporting their gay friend or lesbian sister. I've seen straight people literally cry at public events when telling the story of finding out their brother was gay or that one time they said "I accept you" to their queer bff. What the literal fuck is wrong with you?

Coming out to yourself, friends, family, anyone is an extremely hard process that often leads to people being kicked out of their homes, harassed at work, or physically/sexually abused. Straight people experience NONE of this. I don't care if it was hard on your family to find out your brother was gay, you're not gay, you're not living it, you're not the one that could potentially be harassed or hurt. Straight people that come into LGBTQ spaces and then take up time and resources with their faux martyrdom are absolute trash. Don't try to pretend you understand any of the pain LGBTQ individuals go through, you will literally never know. So stop speaking over our pain.

Another group that comes to mind when thinking about the appropriation of pain is those who so self-righteously inflict white guilt upon themselves.

1. White guilt distracts the conversation from being about the real issues of racism.

If you use spaces dedicated to discussing issues of racism to voice your deep emotional pain and guilt over your ancestors being hugely racist, bigoted assholes, then you yourself are an asshole. Living with a history of your people being enslaved, unjustly murdered, and systemically oppressed is uncountably more times distressing than knowing your dear great great grandad Elmer Mayo-Smith was a racist bag of dicks.

By feeling white guilt, or believing it is even really a thing, you are 1. stating that racism is a thing of the past that only your ancestors took part in when FALSE racism is very much fucking alive today and 2. that your pity party is more important than the real mistreatment and oppression of people of color. Literally, you are insanely privileged if you are white, so stop trying to make the conversation about you. Issues of racism apply to people of color and how they experience the world. Give people of color the space and strength to voice these experiences, frustrations, thoughts, etc. since they are the one's who are oppressed daily. Use your privilege to aid people of color in these efforts NOT use your privilege to paint yourself as the victim when you are the farthest thing from one in terms of racism.

2. White guilt is racist in that it attempts to trump white pain/guilt over the real, historical oppression/victimization/criminalization of black people.

If you think your pathetic white pain is more worthy of being voiced that real systemic oppression, physical violence, and negative stereotyping of people of color than you my friend ARE RACIST.

You are taking vocal space away from people of color by voicing your misplaced white guilt. You are physically taking up space, that you have already been privileged with your entire life, that could be used by people of color to voice their real-life experiences, a space that they have been historically denied and pushed out of.

You are inserting yourself into a space that people of color have fought long and hard to have and create for themselves. You are appropriating their pain, stealing their voice, and derailing the conversation of racism to be about you because you think you are more important. You're about as racist as your old grandad Mayo-man.

Okay so this all sounds like a huge bummer, right? Awww but Bailey...I'm just trying to help...how am I supposed to be a good ally and advocate for the LGBTQ and POC communities? The answer is simple, my friends. You sit down and shut up. You do not get a gold ribbon and a pulpit for a personal dramatic monologue for being an empathetic, decent human being. You do not need to constantly voice your "support" for marginalized groups. We have our own voice and we need a space to let it be heard. We can't do that if you're constantly blabbing about what a great ally your are and how it personally takes a toll on you to support your gay friend or think about your racist grandpa Mayo. So just settle down and share the space.

Don't Be A Jackass, Check Your White Privilege

With everything going on in Ferguson and New York, everyone and their mother's dog groomer's uncle have hopped on social media to voice their opinion. And I am 100% down for that; express yo self. I'm even willing and glad to read opinions that are vastly different than mine. Even though they are infuriating and make me want to move to Mars, I am able to be made aware of opposing view points because of social media.

But I would regret it to my death bed if I didn't use social media and my voice to stand up for what I believe in and attempt to educate others who might not have had the same privilege of an education as me. 

Oooo "privilege", what a word. But what does it mean, Bailey? I shall explain, because as far as I've seen, too many people that I know are completely unaware and ignorant of their privilege and this leads them to voice uneducated opinions and have harmful, oppressive beliefs and I am starting to bald from the stress of knowing these people exist get me a Xanax now. 

So I will attempt to explain white privilege in the most basic, accessible way that I can.

Privilege: a set of advantages, or lack of disadvantages, that a group enjoys usually without realizing or being aware that they have them.

Here are some examples (note: there's like 87 zillion more) if you are so unaware that you don't bother to analyze and critique the way you get to live in society simply for the group/class you were born into:

Male privilege: Do you feel relatively safe walking alone at night regardless of what you're wearing or how intoxicated you are? If yes, congrats you've got male privilege!
Cis gender privilege: Has anyone ever used the wrong gender pronouns on accident or on purpose as an attempt to hurtfully misgender you? If no, congrats you've got cis gender privilege!
Heterosexual privilege: Can you openly display PDA with your partner in public and not worry about your safety or being harassed or being told you're going to hell? If yes, congrats, you've got heterosexual privilege!
Wealth/class privilege: Did you grow up automatically assuming, and being told by your parents, that you would go to college? If yes, congrats, you've got class privilege!
Able-body privilege: Can you perform daily tasks on your own with ease and little pain? If yes, congrats, you've got able-body privilege!
Neurotypical/allistic privilege: Can you have a sad/off day and not worry about people telling you that it's all in your head and you should just *snap out of it*. If yes, congrats, you've got neurotypical privilege!

AND NOW, we shall address white privilege so my fellow pasty friends can stop being absolutely blind to the safety and opportunities that they enjoy simply because of their pallid mayo skin and the extreme danger, oppression, and disadvantages that people of color suffer from.

There's this hella rad feminist and anti-racism activist Peggy McIntosh that wrote an essay called "White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Backpack". I pulled some of my examples from that. It would behoove you to read it yourself if you still aren't catching my drift here.

Here's my list of privileges that *I've recognized in my own life* due to my race. White males have an additional set of privileges that I as a female cannot comment on.

1. I have never once in my life feared police brutality or unfair treatment by the justice system because of my race. Yeah, when I see a cop I double check my lights, my seat belt, turn my music down, and pray to god that my break lights are working because cops make me nervous on the account that I don't want to get a ticket. BUT I've NEVER feared that I'd get pulled over, stopped, or harassed because I "looked suspicious" and I'd never fear that any punishment I received would be extreme or unfair because of someone else's prejudice.

2. I've never been told that I am "pretty for a white girl". I don't have to worry that my race makes me less beautiful or doesn't meet Euro-centric standards. I can wear my hair naturally and not have anyone call me "ghetto" because of it. I get to see a plethora of gorgeous white women in the media and be validated that I am beautiful because I have something in common with those women - my race. If I was a total asshole, I could also appropriate parts of black female beauty culture and I'd be considered ~* quirky and fun *~ instead of trashy or hood.

3. I've never been told that I speak "like a white person" or that I'm articulate for my race. I don't have to worry that my dialect of English will be considered less intelligent or identify me as a criminal. I also don't have to worry that my children will be made fun of and corrected in school because of their dialect. Also, I'll have all my alfredo sauce lookin' friends know that AAVE is NOT standard English with mistakes. It is not any less valid or understandable than what you call (and really should stop) "standard English". I took a linguistics class this quarter, get at me.

4. I've never felt uncomfortable in an airport because of my race. I've never been singled out in security checks. I've never had people move seats away from me on a plane. I don't have to worry that if one white person commits an act of violence that others will label my entire race as terrorists.

5. I've never seen people of other races throwing parties with themes that belittle my special cultural traditions or holidays. No one has every reduced a cultural event that is important to me without knowing any of its importance, meaning, or symbolism, down to fake mustaches, face paint, and pinatas.

6. When I got into college and got a job, I never doubted why I was accepted. I assumed it was because I was qualified and not because of my race. I also never have other people telling me that I got a job because of my race. Also, as a college student, I've never had anyone ask me what sport I play because they assume I didn't get accepted based on academic merit alone.

7. When I learn about the history of my race and my country, it is focused on people of my race. I can devote 4 years (and a quarter...) of my life and ungodly amounts of money to major in English which will REQUIRE classes that focus on authors of my race and include authors of colors as small optional elective classes. I see the faces of the crotchety Founding Fathers and their creepy powdered wigs EVERYWHERE and am assured that this country was founded on white supremacy and people of color essentially accomplished nothing because they're not in the history books, right?

Alright so what now my Wonder Bread looking friends? Are we supposed to just wallow in our white guilt and feel sorry for ourselves because geez I have it so easy wahhhh I feel so bad for people of color. First, cut that shit out. White guilt is not going to do anyone any good and honestly, it's just you inserting yourself into the struggles of people of color. Get out of there, that is not your space. Second, start by just acknowledging these privileges that you have. Notice them, mention them to your other 2% milk looking friends to teach them, and then quit crying and start standing in solidarity with people of color. LISTEN to them when they say something. Do not invalidate what a person of color says because you don't understand; YOU ARE NOT LIVING THEIR LIFE EXPERIENCE. What they say goes. If you truly want to help dismantle white supremacy and systemic racism, do what they say will help.

Let's Talk About Kim's Butt Some More

It seems like whenever female celebrities take nude photos, privately or publicly, the world simply loses their minds and gets their cotton knickers all in a bunch. Female nudes are fabulous and feminist. However, I believe Kim Kardashian's recent nude photo shoot is about a little bit more than nudity and there are some aspects of the photos and the discussions around them that I don't agree with. So for my official contribution to the great Kim K debate, I offer what I think her nude photo shoot IS and IS NOT about.

1. It's NOT about motherhood

This has got to be the most ignorant argument that I've seen against Kim and her photos. People are freaking out because she's a mother and being a mother apparently means you automatically get stripped of all sexuality and never get to be viewed in a sexual way ever again. Yo, like how do you think she became a mother? This wild virgin-mother complex that we enforce on women is absurd. Mothers are supposed to be viewed as virginly. THAT IS NOT BIOLOGICALLY POSSIBLE YOU TWATS.

And for the people that argue this is going to be detrimental and a bad influence on North West, she is going to grow up and after the horrific experience of 6th grade sex ed, she will know that her mother in fact DOES have a vagina and HAS had intercourse and IS a sexual individual. SHOCKER. Wow maybe this child will grow up and not be weirdly taboo and shy about sex, maybe she will be confident with her sexuality and not shame other girls for doing the same.

This woman is celebrating her body which looks bitchin after having a child. Get over it.

2. It's NOT about money

There's a lot of Twitter shade being thrown that is defending Kim because she got paid to do this nude photo shoot...but in doing so, these Twitter-shade-throwers are also shaming other women that don't get paid for nudes. They are shaming women that send nudes to significant others, that take them for themselves, that have them on their personal phone for any personal reason and get personally violated when they're hacked...

On the flip side, there are people shaming Kim for "selling her body" and for the love of all that is holy, are we really equating nude photo shoots to slavery or serfdom? Kim has total autonomy over her body and this is what she chooses to do with it. It probably is empowering for her. No one gives a rat's ass if it's not empowering for you, as well.

No one SELLS their body. Not prostitutes. Not strippers. No one. Women sell their time, their abilities, their experience, their aesthetic. But there is never a moment that a women is selling her body...unless it's like black market organ stuff?

3. IS about body policing

Everyone needs to get over the seemingly ~*~radddical~*~ idea that women should have complete right over their own body. I'm not advocating for our rights to go streaking in children's parks in broad day light, but I will have my right to take nudes without my integrity or character questioned.

Society sexualizes every aspect of women in songs, advertising, movies, etc. but the second a woman does it to herself all bigoted-narrow-minded-shit hits the fan. A woman showing skin on her own or for herself is not the automatic green light to start judging her character or talent. Repeat after me: "Skin =/= character". And if you don't believe that then god have mercy on your soul because your are directly trying to police the way women expose or cover their bodies and directly stating that a woman's worth is always tied to her body and there is a special hell in the 9th circle of Dante's Inferno for you, my friend.

Let a lady be naked. It's just skin. It's just a booty. Stop trying to control what women do with their bodies because it makes your conservative pathetic little mind uncomfortable.

4. IS about race

So yes, one of Kim's photos was recycled from a photo in a book titled "Jungle Fever" and reeks of a history of turning black women into sexual objects, which is all very problematic and makes everyone uncomfortable.

But check it out, we have 2 Live Crew and Sir Mix-a-Lot rapping about large butts on black women in the very early 90s. The social acceptance and sexual praise for large butts came straight from rap culture and was all in reference to black women. So Kim is perpetuating the fetishization of black women and reducing black women to body parts (specifically the booty) much like rappers do. Also, one could argue that it's slight cultural appropriation because Kim is Armenian American with no black heritage.

So cool, a not-black-woman does a border-line racist photo shoot that highlights her majestic ass. Fine. But what happens when ACTUAL black women do this? Remember Nicki Minaj's Anaconda single cover? Nicki, who is Afro-Trinidadian, who is choosing to have control over how her body and booty is viewed, got shamed and called trashy.  Whereas, when Kim poses with quirky faces so it's all fun and cute rather than shamed for being "trashy". So yeah, this is about race.

So next time you see some consenting nudes in the web-o-sphere, if it's not racist, fucking praise that ish! Nothing else. Just say "Glory hallelujah here's another confident woman who is comfortable in her body and with her sexuality and even if I'm not super comfortable in le nude, I respect her for doing her, in Jesus name, amen!"

WhOo0oAaaHh It's The Wild World of Online Social Activism

The internet is a wild place that can literally consume all your time, your life, and the quality of your vision, not that I know from personal experience or anything....But the internet is also a place where niche or oppressed communities can come together to find support, share ideas, and express themselves. ALSO the internet is a super rad place where language is constantly changing, being created, and being re-appropriated.

A lot of people may be against identities and labels thinking that they are exclusionary or get too specific. However, we must ALWAYS give people the right to self-identify however they choose. This means that we must ALWAYS allow new identities and labels to be created by and for certain groups. If you are not a part of that group or identity, then you have no say as to whether their identity is legitimate or not.

So, as an internet junkie and flaming feminist with liberal and sapphic tendencies, I am married to the game of online social activism. Here are a few terms I've learned during my late night internet binges. This might not be the best place to start if you are a newly self identified feminist or social activist, but for those that are well versed or just want to learn more about underrepresented groups, I'd suggest exploring some of these terms further!

General Terms

TERF: Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminist
SWERF: Sex Worker-Exclusionary Radical Feminist
MRA: Men's Rights Activist
SJW: Social Justice Warrior
MSWF: Mainstream White Feminist
Weaponized femininity: a form of feminism that turns misandry into an elaborate joke, especially online. The aesthetic is stereotypically feminine, i.e. glitter, hearts, pink, etc., but expresses a love for misandry and male tears.

Diarchy: refers to a society that operates on a system of a gender dichotomy that is based on mutuality.
Kyriarchy: moving away from just the patriarchy, this term refers to a system that keeps all intersecting oppressions in place, not just sexism. Coined by Elisabeth Schussler Fiorenze.
Mansplaining: when a man assumes he knows more on any given topic than a woman and proceeds to over explain it to her in extremely simplified terms.

Cis-splaining: refers to a cisgender individual over simplifying and talking down to individuals not within the gender binary. Often talks over trans individuals and derails conversations about the trans community to focus on cis privilege.
Whorephobia: a term often used to describe anti-porn and anti-sex worker feminists. These radical feminists are often against the female porn stars or sex workers because they consider them "whores" and not the actual industries themselves.

Sizeism: a form of oppression that discriminates against fat (which is a term now being re-appropriated by the community) individuals by viewing them as lazy, unhealthy, unattractive, fetishized, etc.
PUA: Pick Up Artist, generally refers to men that use degrading and sexually abusive techniques to "woo" women.
FPUA: Female Pick Up Artist, usually women don't use this label as an identifier for themselves, but these women help teach other women the art of seduction rather than listing things they shouldn't do when trying to attract a man.
negging: undermining a woman's self confidence so that she might be more vulnerable and receptive of a man's sexual advances.

Racism

Afrofuturism: a literary and aesthetic movement that blends Afrocentricity, science fiction, and the history of oppression of individuals of color by addressing concerns of the African Diaspora through a science fiction lens.
AAVE: African American Vernacular English
Misogynoir: a form of misogyny that specifically oppresses women of color, especially African American women. This is done by white males and females as well as, black men.

Ableism

Neurotypical: an individual that does not suffer from/has not been diagnosed or self diagnosed a mental or personality disorder.
Neurodivergent: an individual that does suffer from a mental or personality disorder. The concept of self diagnosing is becoming more accepted and supported in online communities.
Allistics: An individual who is not autistic. Often belittles or discredits individuals who self diagnose themselves with autism or Asperger syndrome.

Sexuality & Gender

Bihet: a bisexual in a heterosexual relationship.
Cishet: a term for a heterosexual cisgender individual.
Sapiosexual: a person who finds intelligence to be the most sexually attractive feature of a person.
Demisexual: a person who does not experience sexual attraction to another person until they have formed a emotional or romantic connection with them.
Cupiosexual: a person who desires a sexual relationship but feels no sexual attraction to anyone.
Skoliosexual: a person who experiences sexual attraction to non-binary identified individuals.
Ace: another way of saying asexual, which is a person who is not sexually attracted to others and/or doesn't desire sexual activity in or outside of a relationship.

Gray-Ace/Grace: someone that doesn't identify as sexual or asexual but somewhere inbetween.
Aro: another way of saying aromantic, which is a person who is not romantically attracted to others.
Allo Ace: a term in the ace/asexual community to describe someone who is non-asexual.
Aro Ace: a combination of aromantic and asexual.
Demi Ace: a combination of demiromantic (experience a romantic attraction after an emotional connection has been formed) and asexual. Also sometimes used as a synonym for demisexual.
Truscum: transmedicalists that follow the medical definition of transsexualism - that it is a medical condition and an individual needs sex dysphoria to be trans.
Tucute/Transtrender: terms used for those who support trans people but often exclude transmen, truscum, or trans individuals with mental disorders.

Crossdreamer: individuals that dream about being the other sex and it is often part of their sexual fantasies.
Girlfag: a female who is attracted to gay, bisexual, and/or transmen and who may feels as though they are a gay male within a female body.
Guydyke: a man, generally cisgender and heterosexual, who is attracted to or wants to have relationships with lesbians. The term is used to describe a man who fetishes lesbians.
Autogynephilia: describes a sexuality in which a person is sexual aroused by the idea of themselves being the opposite sex. Distinguished from transgender or transsexual.

Remember that these are legitimate terms that online groups have created for themselves and the oppression they face. Just because you might not understand them or think they don't exist, does not mean that they aren't very real for certain people. Expand your vocab, be accepting of underrepresented groups, let people explore and create their own identities, sell your soul and your 20/20 vision to the interweb for the sake of knowledge!!!